The God Particle: Excerpt page four

"What are you--"

"Life is like this," she says, kissing him with her mouth wide open. Steve is ready to push her away, immediately, but the combination of her lipstick and the wine and the garlic is so human, so organic, that for a split second he enjoys the moment, finally enjoys it. Then he pushes her away.

"Steve--"

"No. Stay away from me."

A percussion of rain envelops them. The nearby buildings seem to shrink even closer. Footsteps of passersby grow louder, then fainter. She stands there, chest heaving, her overcoat wet and clinging. He can't help but notice the swell of her generous breasts.

"You wanted me," she whispers. "I could feel it."

Steve steps out of the alley and she follows him.

"No, I didn't."

"Why can't you just live, Steve? Live! Enjoy yourself. All I want is to see you happy."

"Then leave me alone. That would make me happy."

She blinks once.

"You're an asshole," she says.

"I'm going to be engaged tomorrow. What kind of person would I be if I betrayed Janine tonight, the day before I propose to her?"

"But she's not right for you, Steve. Can't you see that? She only thinks about herself. You need someone who will put your needs first, who knows how special you are and will love you for that."

"You're drunk. I'll get you a cab. Come with me so I can put you in a cab."

"No."

"Come on. Let's get back to the hotel. I don't want you to miss the flight tomorrow."

"I can't sit next to you on a plane for thirteen hours now! I poured out my heart to you and you crushed me. You hate me."

"I don't hate you."

"Yes, you do." She's crying hard now, shivering, and though Steve's instinct is to reach for her, comfort her, he holds his ground.

"Serena--"

She runs.

"Serena!"

The street bends a few feet ahead, and she quickly disappears. Steve knows he should run after her, but Jesus Christ, this isn't high school. Even drunk, Serena had to know the odds of seducing her boss were against her.

He stands in the rain. He knows he should take his own advice and head back to the hotel, but he can't stop thinking about Serena's kiss. About what she said.

Are you happy?

You're always so serious.

You live life like you have a plan.

As a matter of fact, he does have a plan. A written plan. Because he knows that people who don't have plans don't succeed.

He's sure Serena will find a cab and go back to the hotel. She's afraid of Europe and doesn't know the city well enough to do anything else. And her kiss, her hands on him--the desire for more sings unexpectedly inside him, electrifies him. Right now, he wants her. Right now, he would have no problem at all accepting her offer.

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